dude, i just saw a bobcat while i was rollerblading this morning
1 dont ever text someone @ 8am on sat. 2 dont ever admit to rollerblading past 1992.
walkin home..,.jsut saw the cheshire cat
watch out for the queen of hearts
fuucck i forgot ab her
I just opened a bunch of old flavored condoms just to see what they tasted like.
Also I'm 95 percent positive we ate food naked together
we're driving around with this really dirty (unclean and inappropriate) 60 year old ex-san quintin con named old skool d that my brother knows and hes bringing us to get weed. what is montana?
Ong my arms are moving wo my consent
I'm figuring, since someone shoved pizza crust in my ear last night, there might be some leftover pizza.
I just power smoked 3 bongs, ate hot cocoa mix before making hot cocoa, and realized James Spader's character on The Office reminds me of your mom.
Well, I washed his beard with dish soap and then I fucked him three times.
I thought I was heading girls talk. It was the toilet. Like put my ear to it
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
But in today's society it's frowned upon not to wear pants in public.
My ladyscape is the envy of many and the shangrila of few. I will display it proudly.
His chest is so hairy i want to pet it with my nipples.
Ive decided to see your threat against my life as you flirting
she filled my toilet with birdseed... i tried flushing it but now it's clogged so she has to come over and fix it because it was her mistake in the first place
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