I only have two rules. But i've fotgotten those rules and replaced them w 2 other rules
you only like me because i go down faster than a bridge in minnesota
a/c is broke at work...just took my panties off at my desk and the janitor saw it...might have a date for later. let you know
i love when people i haven't talked to since we fucked write on my wall.
It smells like wine and fried chicken. Im confused and intrigued.
Just woke up next to our cab driver from last night. Please tell me this isn't happening.
You opened a bottle of wine with a shoe and a wall last night.
Ladystoner tip: if eyes are bloodshot, lime green eyeliner makes them appear less red. its basic artt.
no, that was the night I slathered your dick in the icing from my birthday cake
Hey.. there are 2 people i've never met before spooning in the bathtub. Please elaborate on what went down last night.
Currently playing beer pong versus the girl i lost my virginity to.....and her mom
IF WE WERE REALLY BEST FRIENDS FOREVER YOU GUYS WOULD AGREE TO A WATCHING A PORNO PARTY
HIS NAME IN MY PHONE IS JOSHUA DREAMCHASER I CAN NOT
NO SHAME NOVEMBER
We had sex to beyonce's "drunk in love" and then he order me pizza. It was perf
Just sent my mother the text "we need to get our vaginas looked at this thursday". Hows your day going?
Randomize
