Billy Mays died!
I know. And the US is beating brazil...what's wrong with the world?
we were making out and he got up to change his pants. I wonder what would happen if i took my shirt off.
i just uploaded pictures of my nephew, and you & d puking in the same toilet. i think i should keep them in the same album. show my nephew what he has to look forward to.
Shaking her cervix like it's the hottest ticket around
Watching that soccer game was like getting kicked in the crotch for an hour and half and then coming right at the end.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
there's sperm and chicken noodle soup everywhere
No He hasn't done that since the time he came in his own eye
I told them I got hit by a car again and now im pretty sure they think im being abused but there was no way in hell the truth was going to fly. Employed people aren't supposed to break their faces in piggy back ride accidents.
Sorry girl, my dick is like a rollercoaster. You only get a picture after you ride
Its official vodka lemonade jager and whiskey with coorslight is a bad combination of try to forget the work week cocktail ps bring alkaseltzer
Was behind a guy going 20 for 4 miles I'll be there as soon as the universe quits fucking me
Last night must have been awesome because I went to get in the shower only to find the bat symbol drawn on my chest
That happened during battle shots lol
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
fell asleep while jerking off ln. woke up to my hand in my pants and my cat crawling all over me
Randomize
