I cut holes in my blanket and put my arms through it. It's the sleeveless "Bro Edition" Snuggie.
like why cant he just admit that he still wants to fuck me even though im underage
she danced around my room naked waving around the gold trojan magnum condoms singing "i have the golden ticket."
little did she know i was taping her the whole time.
Well I disagree, 3 different men in my bed over my birthday was the perfect way to say goodbye to my childhood innocence
I got asked if I was pregnant as a pickup line
also since I use google voice my ads in gmail switched to DUI services after this conversation
it would be cheaper just to buy a dildo to intimidate people with.
Last night we looked at each other with an expression of "fuck I am so done being normal", took off our shirts, and danced around in our bras
i'm in that phase where i'll swallow anything except food
the manischevitz sangria was a big hit
Is there a classy way to tell him that to thank him for his service I would like to put his dick in my mouth?
"Happy Veterans Day! Now pull down your pants."
Weddings might be fun but they are not getting fucked in the wilderness fun.
He offered me free drinks all night if I could beat him in a drinking race. I blacked out after that but just found his credit card in my bra so there's that.
I think i just made eye contact with his roommate... while doing reverse cowgirl. Yup i have no shamee
Did you get drunk between now and two texts ago?
Randomize
