Do you think you have hit the lowest point in your life when you find yourself actually condisering watching the movie "Gigli"?
alright she left, finally time to fart up the room
No dude, you can't hot box a bus shelter.
win or lose for butler, i'm still masturbating to brad stevens tonight
If it wasn't obvious enough to the cops that she was drunk, she threw in, "I like the colors of the lights because it makes purple."
Remember when I said "no boyfriend, no problems"? I lied. Tequila. Tequila is a problem.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
You know, having a conversation evolve from attractive men to roommate orgies would be weird with anyone else, but you get me.
ders ninda duuude pooring goden shots ov glory. I see em an i dont but there hear.
are you attempting voice recognition while drunk again?
took some adderal to make my alochol withdrawl less shitty. now im just concentrating on how badly i need a drink
Random Survey Question: If things start getting serious with this cop, do I have to stop doing coke?
I almost drank vegetable oil. Where were you? I needed you.
But there's never enough margarita money.
This is going to be one of those situations where we lose a day, isn't it
If you can handle my post-party look you da real MVP
We played 2 very competitive games of Jenga and then fucked our brains out... BEST. RELATIONSHIP. EVER.
Randomize
