Lavender boy was great at seduction and crappy in bed.
is hooking up with someone you used to babysit wrong?
We were in the backseat and he was giggling uncontrolably. It felt like I was giving head to a 10 year old girl.
you never know, standards drop, they turn gay, shit happens.
I got her a Nickelback box set.
When your really high you cant order into a clowns mouth
i just spent 10 minutes talking to the lady who works at taco bell about my romantic situation.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I was giving a campus tour, when a drunk senior came up behind me and shouted at the group, "If Jesus ain't your homeboy - get the fuck off this campus!" Looks like his religion course is paying off...
WHY does every guy I sleep with want to fix my car?!
I'm trying to poop and took acid, this is going to end horrid or wonderful. Oh the amusement park, not the pooping.
I did get to watch you pee, tho. That counts as another precious moment.
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
My friend came into the apartment in real handcuffs at 4 in the morning. She was laughing and running around and then proceeded out the door...
Dude, she stopped mid blow job to ask the cat's name. ADHD might be a deal breaker after all.
Randomize
