East Village: Only place you can play pac man while eating a pineapple hotdog, go to the bar next door and see a graphic blowjob on every tv
Is it normal that I have to take off my pants to get mouth stitches removed?
My boogers are black from last night. So that's either from all the colored hairspray or inhaling all of the tragedy from the party...
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
Just because he told you it was safe doesn't mean you should have licked it.
Sexiest use of a semi colon this week, congratulations.
I'm terrified that I'm going to have a baby with a guy who posts snapchat stories while ignoring my texts
I told my dad that he was in a band and he was all like " good job" and then he looked up the band and listened to their music and just went " oh have you disappointed me"
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
I don't care that he's really strong. I need him to make me cum not fix my back problems
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Wow. I want to climb Santa. You've made my mind go places I wasn't prepared to explore.
You spent twenty minutes waxing poetic about her ass and her thighs
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