farters have to be the big spoon...
school has made you so classy.
that's mcgill. producing sluts since 1884.
I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
There's a show on the Discovery Channel about T-Rex sex. I think this just made my life.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
She tried to lure me back to her house by saying she had "real" pizza.
He has a clip art-style heart tattooed on his hip. I hated him way before I saw his tiny dick.
Yeah, I think they knew. I smelled like that telltale combination of strippers and Easter.
I just want to fall into a pit of xannies and eat my way out.
you were so blacked last night that you jumped in the lake fully clothed, then just went back to the bar and walked around like you weren't soaking wet.
There's a baby duck in my toilet. Fuck you.
I met a guy last night who bought me a book on Amazon at the bar and then we had sex. Boners for books is a thing. Boom.
Just keep your throat open and beer will always find its way in.
I am available for nakedness
Did you just affectionately call me a scrotum?
Randomize
