Astroglide: It's like Bengay for your ass.
I really need to stop carrying a flask around with me in my backpack at school..
Aren't you in 8th grade?
9th, but that's not the point.
This is a mass text. Does anyone know what the hell the asian woman at the end of Napoleon Dynamite is doing in the movie
Piggyback rides are my preferred mode of transportation.
Two words Indian burn...
What did she think it was, a shake weight?
At least our walk of shames never included a bag of chips and a jar of queso..
and yes i will spend 10 dollars on a vibrating toothbrush to masturbate but not a calculator for my test
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
I have vodka soaked strawberries. My latest tarot card reading hinted at a lesbian/bisexual coming out. I doubt I survive the night.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
Just remember, Dont make worse choices than american flag pants to your own birthday party
I was chasing pulls of fireball with bites of a bagel and yelling at people to take tequila shots with me. I shouldn't be allowed to go out alone.
I've made this amazing blanket/pillow cocoon combo and I am set for life in here.
Is it bad I use my AA meeting to hookup with guys?
just found a joint on the street in downtown. smoked it with the hot guy from my chem class
WHAT IS UP WITH YOU SMOKING/ DRINKING THINGS OFF THE GROUND?
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