shes hot in the i'd deny it if anyone asked kinda way
I fink we're distracting them from bumping the proverbial uglies
i killed an earwig and left its corpse on the wall as a warning
Dude, Taco Bell gave me a free fiesta potatoes when I won a bet on wether I could fit the entire rim of a cup in my mouth.
She went dumpster diving. Found flourescent light bulbs, carpet samples and $15. We got a bottle of Popov, played star wars and threatened random people with the carpet. Get on our level.
we are all four or five tequila-induced decisions away from shitting in a bucket, come get me please.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
I'm not sure if it was the 11 shots or your naturally vibrant personality but I recall you being quite noisy that evening
BTW my friend remembers her as "the one with the pronounced chin"
I dunno. We kind of want to have a hippie communing with nature type break. But because we're such alcoholics I feel like we'll just be wasted the whole time in addition to hugging trees and shit
The entire state will know me by my boobs.
Saying someone's good at giving head is like saying someone is good at pouring juice like there is that one girl who will spill it everywhere but for the most part it's not that hard to be good at
Halfway through the night I was hiding in a trashcan. Then I "sobered" up and ran around the house throwing change because I wanted to make my last moments of 2013 charitable.
Before you started puking your brains out, you took a moment to give me the correct order of the Harry potter series
We were fucking in the back of my truck and no joke a skunk came up and sprayed us. How am I supposed to explain this to my parents
Randomize