the taste of these tagalongs is totally worth boning that creepy troop leader chick...
I wish I loved anything like you love Tequila.
According to last night if you on the sidewalk at 12 a|m\nYour a WHORE !
..and it was like all of a sudden I could hear the sounds my brain was making
If someone would have told me in preschool that I was going to do him I would have said no
I am never taking advice from you again. The high heels in the shower were a bad idea. I orgasmed and almost drowned.
Apparently I texted my high school english teacher asking her to tell me what logical fallacies she taught us three years ago.
I came in and I guess my parents didn't hear me. My dad just said "Don't be lazy, RIDE IT." to my mom. Never coming home again.
Look at all the pictures I have of us sucking on jello syringes.
So much easier to puke and rally now that my gluten's under control
we are the apple cider girls!
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
I don't care if we're married you can't just walk into the bedroom with a pizza box expecting to get laid
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
My penis definitely considers my Captain Cock costume a success
Nobody on Tinder wants to give you a Blumpkin.
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