what if every blade of grass was a penis?
Just turned my microbiology homework into a drinking game. The words are getting blurry but I think we're really bonding.
I don't know if this beer pong partnership can last if you refuse to look me in the eye when we make sweet sweet clutch cup at the same time.
She pointed at me and told her friend, I'm going to fuck him, its going to be really loud, so yes, i need the whole basement.
He was in a gay KY jelly commercial. Jew male model. Reasons not to sleep with him. Go.
You know were out to late when I call my hook up at 8:08pm and 8:08am in the same night.
I'm in his phone as "nashville blowjob" he also has "cleveland blowjob" "vegas blowjob" etc. i'm okay with this.
God damn him and his understanding ways and little hip muscle things.
Also, the greatest of ironies: I got shampoo confiscated by security while Corey managed to get pot through. MERICA!
I am laying in your bed and just found a bottle of wine under your pillow ...should have married you...
He's hot and has an accent therefore you don't ask questions when he tells you to take your pants off.
The original plan involved fireworks and a lot more dildos but the new one is still okay.
If i'm forever fucked up in this state of mind then I'm going to kill him for this
i saved a drunk oompa loompa he was passed out on the lawn and i picked him up figured out where he lived and put him in his bed and wrote his roommate a note
His penis is average but his stamina is amazing!!! I didn’t know I had that many orgasms in my body!!!!
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