Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
how do i say, "my ex is going to be at this party so don't look like shit" without sounding like a bitch?
She just got out of the car and said "hold on purse.. It's going to be a bumpy ride"
He said last night that he'd never had such a great conversation and such a great handjob at the same time.
Being the adderall dealer on campus, I feel responsible for everyone graduating.
I kinda volunteered your dick to help her deal with her virginity issues. Figured you wouldn't mind.
Call me when you get off. I have stories about black lesbians in jail begging to braid my hair...
High gym went like this: I went to Dairy Queen instead.
I'VE CAME 4 TIMES TODAY. I AM AS DRY AS THE SAHARA, STOP YOUR WHINING.
In two unrelated events today I have had frostbite on my toe and cum up my nose. Who says life stops when you get married?
I need a present that says please like me even though i'm banging your grandson
Is it completely inappropriate to base my morning after pill purchase on if they sell coffee or not?
I got the beer and the first aid kit. You get the tequila and burn cream. We should be set for the camping trip.
Is it ok to bone a former patient who is also a client? Since it is two negatives does that cancel and become a positive?
Randomize
