trent lit his nipple on fire and said "i am the only highlander"
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
I'm guessing "whatever I can get" wasn't the reply the nurse wanted when asking what med I need. Oh, and asked for a cartoon band-aid.
can you go into shock from having too many orgasms? i think i went into shock.
I'm trying on my bridesmaid dress so that I can determine what will need to be done to achieve getting fucked while wearing it.
The best part of tonight is drunk commenting on my moms pic about how birds just want to give you diseases and pluck out your eyes
It summer and it's getting a lot harder to hide sex bruises from my parents.
First world problems?
according to the video, you won you first drunken karaoke contest based off of your actual singing abilities and not because you took your shirt! I've never been prouder :)
I seriously have her in my phone as "Legit 8"...even I'm surprised
Mom kept me on a leash as a kid, did you know this?
When she went in the beer store I got to hold it.
My heart wants him and my vagina wants him...to have a bigger dick.
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
I just borrowed porn from my middle aged mother. This is what desperate looks like.
The last thing I remember is trying to chug the rest of the everclear, running through a fence, and laying down in the snow. I hurt.
just said thank you to the lady who gave me a body search at the airport
Randomize
