Yeah, where have you been?
Clearly not facebooking enough. Sweet jesus.
Yes, it's true. 4 fingers.
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
Became best friends with the hotdog stand creeper outside the bar. Cried and told him my feet hurt too much to walk home then begged him to hire me.
Just high watching the holiday fireplace channel. My space heater lends authenticity to the fire experience. Come over.
you were upstairs in your room looking out your window and saw him puking in your bushes outside. you then proceeded to open the window and sing Come To My Window
I figure a girl that drinks as much as I do should always have pregnancy tests on hand
I found your doppelganger. same hair, eyes, personality, catch phrases, and penis. it was mind-boggeling.
After a little too much, I decided public urination was a constitutional right.. Nearly got deported for that one
Totally clawed myself in the face during sex. I can die happy?
We smoked before the sunrise hike. I ended up eating a banana and singing Circle of Life as the sun rose over the horizon.
He didn't have much of a personality. But I had like 100 orgasms, so that's cool.
For the record you're an amazing lay and you have great taste in breakfast sandwiches
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
How do I word.. " hey, I need you to fuck me really hard and see if you or I can feel my birth control. No worries, this is just an experiment." In a nice way without them feeling used.
Randomize
