so i told my doctor my symptons and she just shook her head at me
Making out with married ex girlfriends: priceless
I'm drinking reisling in a paper cup by myself in the garage.
Ok just saw a girl open a pillbox, dump it out on her notebook and count out 13 adderall tabs and put them in a baggie and leave. Oh hey college.
last night i found out that about 5 of my friends audio recorded us having sex through the bedroom door, then auto tuned it in the tpain app on his iphone.
There's a high school volleyball camp on campus this summer. I'm definitely going to jail.
Just saw some guy puking out of the dorm window, its for sure monday
So I pull up to an apartment complex and immediately felt like I was here to get stoned.
Well five day drinking adventure in appreciation of cinco de drinko under the belt, great way to start may
I'll take "things you shouldn't say to a guy you just met in a bar" for 100!
I wonder how long it will take her to realize that I peed in her night stand.
i just want to die with dignity and clean teeth, is that too much to ask?
I peed outside 4 times after the bar, safe to say I had great night
Fuck my life he IS a stripper, Ive been sleeping with a stripper named Phoenix. damnit, I knew the sex was too good
Why did two squirrels just run out from behind the couch?
About that.
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