So how did finding that girl you know on GGW go?
I was so pissed when it just previews her all covered up. It would have been easier to just have sex with her
Yeah but then you would have a case of genitals gone wild
my mom just threw water on me to get me awake and is screaming "where is my fucking car?!"
you gave me a ride last nite what the hell did you do with it after you left me?
sometimes i just want to live alone. my roommate keeps looking at me weird like hes never seen a girl eat plain salt before
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
I faked it too. I just spit on your bed.
You going out tonight?
No I am at the hospital. Throwing up blood is apparently frowned upon.
She washed lettuce and peppers in the shower and proceeded to make a salad
Well now I have my semen on her headphones
He smashed a plastic chair leg on a tree stump, threw himself into the side of our metal enclosure, stomped on the wreckage for a bit and then punched the fire.
I told him I had to grab my Swedish fish from the car before they froze. Then I just left. But the fact that he knew how important it was not to have my fish freeze almost made me come back in....almost.
I'm pretty sure our sex is better than most foods and that says a lot too bc I really like food
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
How did you get so drunk?
Alcohol.
I'm eating ice cream out of my purse
You asked me how red your eyes were... they were shut.
Randomize
