Viking lives by an ancient code of honor that we do not understand.
What code could that possibly be? Bothering the fucking shit out of people while being physically repulsive?
aparently we are going to have sex infront of her friend. ill call you tomorrow
Some asshole just brought BK into my summer class, im already high as hell, i did not need another way to not pay attention
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
My bed is full of blood and feathers
Did I change midway through last night?
Seven times. The most notable outfits were UFC Fighter and Top Hat Viking
I legitimately thought I was gonna die getting finger banged to ja rule in the back of your car last night.
Please tell me last night did not happen and there is another reason why my phone smells like ranch sauce ahahah
I have a strong contender for the new number 1 position for fwb. He met me at the door with pizza and a shot of patron
My fridge door just caught on fire somehow.
only I would find a long lost relative through a craigslist casual encounters ad
too bad we didn't bet. my 38-1 tears would have made great lubrication for a blow job.
I need a drink. No, several. I need several drinks. Drunk, I need to be drunk. Definitely need to be drunk
Only if I get to be Gritty
How would you be Gritty for a fantasy hockey league?
Don't worry about it.
I know it's super late on a work night, but can you drop by and bend me over my new motorcycle? I have tequila and tacos...
Randomize
