It was like a secret agent hookup. No names, swift execution, get in- get out.
Also, I'm sewing my entire Halloween costume by hand. I better get laid at every single party I go to.
I drank myself into bisexuality again.
I think off duty cops drove me home. I may have been hitchhiking
BTW send me your address and size of condoms you wish your lover was-- "if you build it, they will come"
I forgot how easy it is to have sex in public when you're wearing a dress. Thank you global warming.
I'm gonna go to bars and pick up women hopped up on democracy.
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
he was having a black light party and drinking manischewitz wine out of a three foot tall trophy he stole from mcdonald's...that's when I decided it was time to leave
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
him and the cab driver we buy e from got into a fist fight, about which show is better, futurama or family guy.
Can you tell dad to stop liking and sharing porn on FB again?
I just learned in class that female whales slap their fins against the water and then ten males come and fight for her yet we can't get guys to text us back
the good news is I finally used my captain america waffle maker to make captain america waffles
I'll be naked. By 11. Then arrested. Drunk tank adventures
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