Youre a pretentious asshole and im not sure who you think you are. Get the hell over yourself and the self righteous culture snob image because its pretty obnoxious.
whats the weirdest thing you ever masturbated to?
King Triton
Why didn't you tell me that Dad was a registered sex offender?
We were going to tell you eventually, how'd you find out?
Our school resource officer showed us how to use Family Watchdog and pulled up his picture.
She made fun of how I walked so I announced to her boyfriend that I have cum on her face before.
idk if ive ever seen a picture of him on facebook with his pants on
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
My dildo fell into the bathtub. It sounded like a chainsaw.
I told you, we're just gonna get ripped and light sparklers
Its not that hard, just find a girl reading 50 shades of grey and point her my way
I CAN'T FUCK HIM OUTSIDE. THAT'S FOR PEASANTS. HE'S TOO FAMOUS FOR THAT.
I did my patriotic duty. I woke up next to a veteran this morning.
We both fell asleep mid-handjob and he continued to call it "handjob halftime".
We were sad, then we got horny, and then we needed some ranch
It took me longer to finish the bottle of scotch we bought together on New Years than it did for her to meet a new guy and get engaged
he offered to let me fuck his brother , of course im marrying him
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