let me know it goes. try not to get bit. and if you can, get someone to videotape it.
so she asking me "is it okay to have dangling labias?"
i just made a girl do the walk of shame. as a bumblebee. i love halloween.
I just drank Colt45 out of a champagne glass. I feel classy.
Colt 45 out of anything is classy.
He only talks to me during the summer and it's probably because I let him fuck me in my pool last year.
i would have thought, that you two being my best friends, one of you would have atleast tried to catch me before i hit the ground after blacking out.
Finally better. I had to use eye makeup remover to get the purple wine stains off my lips
I told her that I was going up to my room to lay in front of a fan without pants on, watching Avengers and she still wanted to get with me. I have to marry her.
I have to sanitize my nipples and its just to cold in here for it to be ok
How can other people our age be acting like adults when I'm still taking my birth control pill with left over gin and tonic from the night before?
Never in my life did I think i would give a blow job in the bathroom of my old elementary school. Twice.
Why is everyone judging me for telling the cat a bedtime story?
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I just bought a mini nerf gun so he could make a bowl out of it, I deserve the fuck buddy of the year award!
So, I'm roughly 90% sure that the guy next to me in the xray waiting room is watching porn on his phone right now
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