are you sure you're not interested? he's the dunkin donuts employee of the month.
i just googled "alcohol delivery service". im combating drunk driving one lazy act a time.
All we had was a keg so we played edward nalgene-hands
well he showed me a naked baby picture and i was right it hasn't grown
Don't remember much from last night, but I recall slipping you the tounge. For that I apologize
She started licking your face, then you turned to me and said "I guess thats my cue", and you proceeded to hook up with her.
i just declared my major based on how close the department building was to our apartment. laziness has been brought to a new level
nothing like walking in the house at 3 am in my panties and a sheer shirt carrying a life sized cardboard dale earnhardt jr
My chest smells like french fries. Get at me attractive men.
Im calling you paparazzi cause of all the dick pics you take of your one night stands ps loved the panoramic one!
I was like wtf you can warn a girl like hey I have a huge dick and I fuck for hours
Someone google feeding your vagina Advil and Neosporin
I don't know man. I fell outside Pizza Hut and an employee had to perform first aid. But I think I got free pizza. So it was worth it.
I responded like every reasonable adult would. With a gif
No you just wanted to pass out in your hallway because your room was too far away
Why would I want a relationship when I’m the side dick for my boss and a few women from the gym
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