belinda wants 2 know wr u got ur butt pads
i dont wear butt pads that thang is au naturel
Yeah...right...LMAO
TXT her NOW! The phone is actually IN her Va-Jay-Jay!!
alcohol turns me into mario batali of easy mac
There are the 2 BIGGEST tools by me-- at our table. I hate them. But they're not ugly and I may make out with them later. And hate myself. Definitely hate myself.
is there a reason why there is cup of piss in the fridge?
no
I mean, I thought you would respect me for turning your life around for the better. It seems just yesterday that I found you in a ditch with a cock in your mouth.
Can we do a version of last night where I actually remember shit?
and I think you ate the old crusty spaghetti on the counter when we came home last night judging by the carnage
I don't know what was up he just kept sitting in his chair smoking weed and watching home movies all night it was weird as fuck.
i can't believe i'm giving you sex advice.
i've gotten sex advice under stranger situations. like while giving a blowjob behind the communications building.
His new place is a molesden. Like a hole in the ground. It's frightening how oddly private it is.
It rubs the lotion on it's foreskin...
I'm sorry, the person you're trying to reach is WAYYY too high to deal with this right now.
don't worry about my dad. he just hates you because you're liberal, not because we're fucking.
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
I think I just scared the sex out of my booty call. He saw me at the grocery store using one of those "future mother" parking spots right next to the handicap ones. He just made eye contact and drove off. I regret my laziness.
Randomize
