Princeton has an emergency contraception worldwide website. It is in moments like these that I love my university
If he doesn't notice me by the next party, i'm just gonna go up to him and pll his pants down and blow him.
Sounds like a plan.
Nah, I'm just going to keep fucking him until he realizes we're perfect for each other.
While he was going down his phone rang and he answered saying I'll call you later I'm eating.
shes the only person ive ever met that could make "i don't swallow" sound sexy
Before I left he asked me if I could submit my panties for the frat house undergarment chandelier. I said yes
I took us ten minutes to realize the shower sex going upstairs was the reason the kitchen ceiling was flooding.
Things I have that belong to you: shorts, headband, bra, purse, chinese food, vodka, and blood on my jeans. Happy homecoming.
I woke up in a tutu and topless. How was your night?
Man, I want to make his penis a sandwich.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
We had a quickie at work in the office. He walked out before me, and I fell asleep while waiting a few minutes to walk out. Yeah. He's got that change your life dick
Throwing up while listening to NPR because I’m trying to adult through this hangover
so on the street and some kid is chanting "cheeseburger, cheeseburger, cheeseburger!" while pumping his fist in the air. i agree.
-367$ and a torn scrotum.. Panama wins
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