hi brent please bring bad word music cd must most bad word please brent bring cd music bad word please brent bring cd music bad word
areee we human. . .oorrr areee we dancerssssss?!
you srsly need to quit going to that bar
what's Bukake?
a bad idea.
I feel like I could be a daytime drinking legend, like they could put that shit on my tombstone and right now your preventing me from reaching my full potential
hungover subway ride filled with german tourists and a mariachi band. too early. too fuckin early
I JUST MET THE GIANT MAN THAT WILL CARRY ME FROM PLACE TO PLACE
What color suit is the proper "i banged the bride" attire?
Exactly. Some of us want to get married. And some of us want to wear sombreros and do cocaine. To each their own.
Law school has no idea what kind of prospect they have coming in. I just convinced a cop not to take me to jail by asking him if he really felt like cleaning puke out of his car tonight.
Just walked into your room to get my clothes and he's still passed out in your bed. Remind me to high five you when you get home
I came to the party for him. I don't know where he went, but I mentioned being hungry and his housemate brought me a huge tupperware container of berry cobbler. I think I'll stay.
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I don't remember anything after falling in the ditch, but I now have confirmation that my rib is broken. Never drinking again.
The laundromat is nothing like In the pornos
Actually, lets be honest. I will probably keep calling him the pastor because it brings me joy using pastor and fuck buddy in the same sentence.
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