You know, I didn't realize this at the time, but it appears that I am being "heavily petted" by 3 grown men in that pic.
If these were biblical times then you'd be a Roman Senator.
This girl added me on fb and has all these pics of her kissing her little brother saying i will love you forever. I'm creeped out.
maybe it's her son
thats not any better.
just did the walk of shame by his grandma. what the fuck is an old lady doing up at six am?
This guy behind me is answering all of her questions. I may give him a lapdance to take my next test for me
He was singing Will Smith Just the Two of Us to his burrito. That high.
i was the DD for the swedish students tonight. Got paid 23 dollars for driving 10 miles. gotta love ignorance and the confusion conversion brings.
say it with me now .. the "golden" penis. his nickname does not disappoint.
Would you be offended if I asked you to smoke a blunt with me while I pooped?
I'm currently trying to decide if crown or wild turkey will hurt worse coming back out through my nose later.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
My parents just told me that if I stop drinking I could do something great with my life...
They obliviously haven't seen you dance on top of a pool table then
OMG MY DAD TOLD ME HE MIGHT DO TINDER
I'm only coming over if you have cocaine or a snickers bar
I'm bringing pajamas, aspirin, morning after clothes and morning after pill
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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