I wanna crawl in your skin and have dreams about Bobby Kennedy tonight.
yeah I know. she is a stupid fat trailer trash bitchwhore and I hate her
but when she came up to me in the bar I had to be all like "OMG HEYYY how are you, I haven't seen you in foreverrrrr!!"
but for the record, yeah, I hope she gets mauled by a bear and dies
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
he thought i was a dude.
Girls behind me in the library are trying to outslut each other with stories from last semester. I'm about to set my cock on the table between them and label it "tie breaker"
I'm trying to have a "pick me up from my house so I can get completely annihilated night" any takers? Cmon people this is what friends are for
I forgive you, at least you vote. I found out my fuck buddy isn't even registered. I won't fuck a non respectable citizen.
I am sufficiently unimpressed with the options available to my freshly shaved self tonight.
This isn't good. I can't find my mom. This is why we don't give her Fireball.
Before consuming her Waffle House she did a few deep breaths and cleared the table to "prepare herself for this"
Am I under any obligation to let my new fuck buddy know I slept with his little sister?
she said that no one there was hot enough for her so she then proceeded to give the passed out person a lap dance because he was "her type."
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
I just had a mini meltdown cause I thought they forgot to put the cheese packet in my mac and cheese. I'm having an awful week.
Fuck you bitch. You're married. You got a live-in dick at home for your needs. I still gotta surf this shitty town's bars for cock
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