i just got a Mexican deported. not sure how to feel.
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
he put listerine on his cock to make the taste more "enjoyable"... i think hes a keeper.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
My uncrustable is thawing in my straightener
I'm standing outside of the bar watching homeless men teach a kid how to pee of the sidewalk.
I just picked up my chili cheese fries off the ground ate them, and then licked up the cheese that was still on the concrete. Thank you Jagerbombs
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
Whatever it's Canadian jail, it's not like Guatemala or something. It'll be nice and cushy and they'll probably throw him a big bday party with all his friends and strippers
Idk I was embarrassed that I hit it too hard so I played it off by spitting out bong water like a 'whales blowhole'
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
OMFG I JUST SEARCHED DILDO ON THE WORK SHARED AMAZON ACCOUNT!!!!!
I don't want to spend an inordinate amount of time with you, I want to have sex with you. Duhhhhhh.
Idk she seemed really innocent until she snorted that line of vicodin
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