check it out our google latitudes are spooning
my mario cart skills improve with alchohol. and i think my real car skills do to but the cop didnt see my logic
Is it weird that I found myself thinking of that blue chick from Avatar while she gave me head after the movie?
Wait, we're on the hunt for addys and explosives. They're both in this house somewhere.
i told her my name was noah and she leans in and whispers "that makes me so wet." ive never been more thankful for the Notebook
i've officially fucked a sailor, a policeman and a biker. I've never noticed my Village People fetish until now...
So I've gone into the break room to heat up a styrofoam cup 8 times over the course of 4 hours.. that desperate to see him. Now I have a broken heart AND cancer.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
Remember the bouncer that knocked out Dave and Sam? Apparently his day job is a florist. Uppercut and fresh cut in one package.
Would jacking off with Benadryl cream be good or bad for the poison oak on my dick?
Last night I dreamed that I got eaten out by Lego Harry Potter.
Got promoted and on my way out the door was informed that my beard makes my face perfect for riding. Today is gonna be a good day.
You could see the bone sticking out of his shin and he insisted he was "just gunna walk it off"
Is it weird that I'm mad at my boss because he isn't paying me enough attention? Maybe my dad issues are worse than I thought
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
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