ok, i just want to know who did it and which end it came out of
he made transformer sounds every time he changed positions. how do you think it went?
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
i didn't know falling asleep in the tbell line could get you a dui. Isn't everyone there stoned or drunk?
whatever, you made your decision to be a responsible student and where did it get you? a pushed back exam and no blowjob.
A kind stripper put a blanket over me last night
She just licked her nipple in public to get a free bar tab.
There's never a time that i stay at this apartment that when i wake up in the morning and sit outside to smoke a cigarette that i don't feel ashamed of myself.
You made out with a guy who refers to his cock as "rafiki." Are you proud of yourself?
Brought him brownies before taking his pants off. I'm like the Martha fucking Stewart of booty calls. Walk of shame be damned.
I'm watching him slurp a whole mango out of her hand. It's disturbingly arousing.
Honest opinion...too aggressive to bring the funnel out to the bar? Also just so you know im at the bar. with the funnel.
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
idk i was trying to watch Fuller House and you got up out of a dead sleep, just in your boxers, said "no more Dave Coulier" and walked out to the living room and unplugged the router
I'm sitting in the car vaping at an elementary school to try and deal with the stress of existing. About how i thought being 30 would go for me tbh
Randomize
