my facebook friend requests are always from girls of boyfriends i have fucked, facebook is the worst reminder of shame
So he thought it would be a nice gesture to show me his list of girls he fucked. There was 70. We then went through and put "V"'s next to all the ones that were virgins...
i just google imaged poop.
STOP acting like a freshman, you have a drivers liscence now AND a PERSCRIPTION for birth control. Dont give all sophmores a bad name. Woman Up
This is the first time I have ever hoped it's poison ivy on my cock
Yeah I remember I tried to close her head in the freezer last night
I'm just pissed at the whore who takes over my body when I'm blacked out.
Went to an open-bar law school party and puked in front of Justice Scalia. My legal career is now complete -- I literally got judged by a U.S. Supreme Court Justice. Can't get any higher than that.
No, we got so into acting out our role play characters we didn't even fuck. still sucess.
The picture that pops up when I call her phone is a picture of my nipple. Just so you're forewarned.
He's an acquired taste, like S&M or those crunchy things they put in salads
Croutons?
You took off all your clothes to try on her fur coat and then punched me when I said you couldn't wear it to bed.
Honesty, no. I just want to shower you with hot dogs.
You poured your drink on him and called him a "useless cocksucker" because he wouldn't give you a ride home... on his skateboard
You will drink beer in a kiddie pool in your back yard but you wont bring a girl home
Randomize
