You blewit but ill be back in laekciew tonigthso calll mee
the mole on his forehead could get me off better than his dick
please tell me you have proof of this
Yes, I fucked her, no she wasn't that loose, yes she caused more drama than a 14 year old girl
We should search craigslist for porches to sublet.
He told him to "throw up in my mouth like I'm a baby bird."
He wasn't lying when he said he was immune to pepperspray. He pretended it burned for like 12 seconds and told the cops he was kidding he was alright. We'll be there soon.
You do realize how pathetic it is when the woman who does your bikini waxes has seen your vagina more than I have
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
You put on some guys Birkenstocks that were abandoned on the dance floor overtop of your flats. Then ran out of the bar high gives the bouncer and said "look at my new kicks" then he was like woah wait a minute someone is missing those and made you return them. You were very upset
He watches the nature channel every time I am here. It's like a manipulation technique because baby zebras will get me every time.
I don’t know if I’m nauseous or just disgusted with myself.
You woke up at like 4 in the morning fell off your bunk bead, yelled at Nic for asking if you were ok, walked to the kitchen, pissed on the keg, and then looked at me and said "Still not worth it" then went back to bed.
I kinda just want to steal him and keep him forever
Ugh hungover at a laundromat is a terrible feeling. For some reason I keep getting sucked into staring at the clothes spinning around and around and it makes me want to profusely projectile vomit everywhere
At least they took the pillow of my bed before they had sex. My friends are so polite.
Randomize
