i feel like a thai whore the morning after the navy left.
Do you still like to have your hair pulled?
No, I never liked having my hair pulled. I think you have me confused.
just took batteries out of my vibrator to play wii guitar hero. think i am gonna regret that move later tonight.
If you're going to watch porn, can you atleast be considerate and watch it on my old laptop and not the new one?
So not only did team sweden fail to particpate in any drinking game but i also found puke in my viking helmet this morning.
it took me 20 minutes to get her upstairs... she crawled under a car and wouldn't come out.
Edward fifth and chaser hands
Welcome to the first annual slutathon and let the men be ever in our favor
I hate that we are older than the real world people now
I was on all fours trying to empty the bowl we smoked into the sewer when your neighbor came out, but besides that it went smoothly
No it was fine, I've just never seen that many people eat dog food
IT IS EARTH DAY, RECORD STORE DAY, 4/20 EVE, AND SATURDAY ALL AT THE SAME TIME!
Best news I’ve heard all day. Cookies and dick. What more could a girl ask for?
I'm like a bad decision making factory. I need to sit down and have a chat with my decision making elves.
You kept saying, "please sir, can I have some more."
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