I don't understand why some guys want to have a huge conversation while standing at the urinal with cock in hand...
Do u kno any dealers?
I've officially lost all respect for you, dad.
i knew she was desperate at the point in which she started showing me her naked pics on her phone
organizing the empties. That sober.
Your one and only job is to make sure I am on that bus tomorrow morning with no cat makeup on my face
we should drop off a car at the police station before going out tonight so we can drive home in the morning
Man, I thought my dick was gonna fall off.
Dude, I didn't even think they made slap bracelets anymore. You okay?
Her shirt said pass joints, not judgement. You're surprised she stole your wallet after?
I ran into the kitchen halfway through hooking up cause I forgot I put the cookies on the oven too high. Came back and she was gone but the only thing I could think about was all the extra cookies I could eat now. Got through about 6 before I realized why she left.
We were at dinner and dad asked me to pass the salt and I suddenly remembered doing body shots when I was blacked out last weekend.
We just stood there eating chocolate chip pancakes, watching you sleep on the bathroom floor.
remember when I lost my virginity and said I could see myself becoming a sex addict?? Well I'm pretty sure that time has come
You can't honestly expect me to maintain an erection when you have the Glen Beck show on
When did we go from stumbling drunk into an ER at 3am to dinner double dating?
I'm kind of upset that he wanted to have sex instead of watch Harry Potter. I mean it's Harry fucking potter.
Randomize
