Yeah true. Damn vaginas. They're ruining the world.
if she shaves her mustache, i'll let her give me head
I'm watching a show called "I didn't know I was pregnant" on TLC...Apparently this happens enough that there is a series
I wonder if those guys know that i know that is a halfway house and dont just think it is some cool older guy frat house.
I think your going to be the cause of an awesome death
i totally just wrapped her wedding gift in tin foil. These are the skills 2 bachelor's degrees have given me.
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
he knocked a glass of water onto my bed and then said that he should get to sleep on the dry side because he was "a guest"
I am in his childhood bedroom and I feel like his trophies are applauding me and his stuffed bunny is disgusted with me. Did you know he was a mathlete?
I'm just gonna go with where the wind takes me. if it takes me to his dick, so be it.
why is "bang the student affairs grad assistant" the third highest thing on your semester goals list
So I considered mediating this morning and instead I master-bated...same thing right?
Just paid for my STD meds using a giftcard I got for Christmas. Thanks mom.
What do you bring to an "I'm getting divorced party?"
.......Shattered dreams and tequila?
Pretty sure he was in my class in like 2nd grade
I like how you know everyone I've ever fellated.
Randomize
