Just incase you were wondering, the count of ladies who have perioded on chairs at our fine restaurant is now at 3.
Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
just put cider in my bong. gotta love fall
Ordered my mom Mother's Day flowers online and moved on to internet porn. Do you think this is some sort of Freudian slip?
I swear to god he's a one man village people.
Didn't get to fuck her. Had to leave abruptly through window. Explain later.
im almost positive that in mid thrust she told me she was pro choice
I swear she hasnt shaved since the last time we hooked up 5 months ago
I tried to make friends with the geese living behind Hughes. They didn't really like that idea.
Are you high?
I never thought that it would get to the point where I would have to specify that by "hang out" I meant "fuck like rabbits." Growing up shouldn't be this way.
I suppose what I've learned from this experience is that sometimes you just have to make out with a narcissistic baby daddy to make a clean getaway.
He's so vague sometimes. Like dude, we've been friends for 3 years. I don't need you to be vague, I need you to be inside of my vagina.
I will gladly accept you into my home with open legs.
I'm slowly getting to where I don't hate people anymore.
Never mind. Some random dude just walked past me and asked if I was having fun. I snarled at him. I might still kinda hate people.
I got a lap dance in honor of your birthday last night.
Thank you.
theres a video...
oh god.
Randomize
