how do you have sooo much energy?
billy mays threw in a lil somethin extra when i ordered some oxiclean last week
i'm laying naked in your bed you should probably come home
move.
Just threw up off a chairlift. my life is now complete.
I was in a threesome last night that turned into a violent domestic dispute with damage to a hotel. Wish you were there!
there were more penises there than on chat roulette
I won't be sarcastic... just naked
Had sex on a washing machine in a pool of beer. Can you say success.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
You used up your allotted blow job minutes for the month of April last night anyways
I attempted to stand up and was quickly reminded by gravity that I am the universe's bitch right now
i was on the fire escape while he ate me out for a while before i realized he had shut the door behind us and locked us out and i proceeded to climb down the stairs and climb back into the party through the window.
i can only hope to be on your level one day.
yeah she's crazy. she fought a possum in my alley because it was "being a cagey little cunt"
You're not talking any sense into me. You're cheering me on to disaster.
... is that not half the reason I'm your best friend in the first place?
Why did the sexual harassment class show a clip from frozen?
She was sitting on the couch in his tux jacket...no pants, eating cold vegetable lasagna. Yet I'm the weirdo?
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