I dont abuse you, i just hit you while we have sex
Question: terrible or awesome when a girl give you head so vigorously that you get a hickey of sorts
the last thing i remember is fucking her. GAME CHANGER i woke up in another bedroom to her younger sister blowing me
bring the vodka.
i thought we were going to mcdonalds..?
we are.
All the walks of shame were condensed into the hour before parents started showing up. Move out day is so bittersweet
There is something about weddings and lines being done off my ass
Once he past out I measured his penis with my remote.
Soooo how am i supposed to explain to my mom that i was admitted to the hospital but you kidnapped me within 20 minutes?
I'll have my hookups make my March Madness picks. Win my bracket, win my heart. That's how it works right?
No Robbie is the name of a kid or dog, not an adult man who's fucking you.
I feel you. We can get adjoining rooms. It'll be like Disney world, but with drugs and ivs instead of roller coasters and Mickey Mouse.
Which is way cooler
If there's one thing i learned from edward 40hands is that i couldnt handle life with bottles for hands
They only searched every other person. But I sacrificed myself to get our vodka across the border
His dad was on the tv delivering the local 11 o' clock news while we were having sex
Someone who makes you cum so hard that you have an asthma attack is clearly your soulmate
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