have you facebook stalked him yet?
No, I don’t know his last name...
Just google his license plate numb
I figured he was gay when I walked in on him working out to Flirty Girl Fitness.
My fight-or-flight response is really more fight-or-fuck
I found the hair cut I want on the girl in the porno I'm watching. now really sure how to show my stylist.
let's be real here, you have a beautiful vagina. this kid is a doctors son. that's a remedy for beautiful rich grandkids. he is just trying water his family tree, and make sure he doesn't end up in some piece of shit adult home. go for it.
He wasn't eating out, he was performing a hysterectomy without a license....should I be worried about my future family?
Nope. If I'm going to drive an hour to fuck a teacher, it will NOT be missionary thats for damn sure.
Is singing the Indiana Jones theme while I put on the condom off limits?
I'm not the one who can lose their erection, so it's fair game
Remember when I asked you to make sure I didn't go home with anything less than a 6 last night? You're fired
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
The guy at the door just stared only at my boobs and said "I'm gonna let you in." 'Merica
You left me a voice message at 5 a.m. It was mostly incoherent noise, you screaming my name and then something about a man with two butt holes...
I want to get "Patrick Kane" wasted tonight
I am one hundred percent down for that
I also guarantee you multiple orgasams and blueberry pancakes
He couldn’t find my clit with a map. Literally. I drew him a map.
Randomize
