when you find your car can you pick me up? his mom is here and im hungover
His mom made me a necklace that i am supposed to wear to prom. She included a note with it, which had a star trek quote. What have I gotten myself into?
sometimes when i'm walking through campus i wonder how many of these people have seen me puke
I need to stop researching the drugs I do on Wikipedia. The parts about abuse and dependency hit too close to home
i kinda regret how quickly i gave it up to him, but i just wanted the regular fucking to begin soon. ah we made good memories.
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
I've realized that my life is in no way structured to be compatible with monogamy. I'm not adjusting to this well.
I sang Jenna happy bday in the middle of throw up hurls
She kept telling the ambulance to sit down and then started crying when we told her it couldn't hear her
is it bad that my walk of shame involves the church shuttle?
he just hooked up with some chick in a bedroom upstairs so I just went to sleep in the pantry closet...
On the 3rd day, she mixed sangria and orange juice and saw that it was good.
The dorm caught on fire so it turned into a 5am pool party
Did she owns a vibrator that will set off seismic activity.
Ended up in some house where this dude has a $1200 leopard cat
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