I swear she didn't look like that last week.
Now would be a good time to set your alarm to pick me up from jail in the morning.
She's dressed as Musafa. How could this not be a good idea?
I love memorial day. It's drinking in the name of patriotism. God Bless America
We started playin just the tip, then shit got crazy
What are the odds of finding the one hot Australian dude with erecile dysfunction?
Also I've decided that I'm buying the next friend of mine who is dumb enough to get married a live porcupine as a wedding present.
It would have to be recorded, because that sex tape would be humanity's primary evidence of miracles
We should get Al Michaels to provide commentary for it.
I mean with a sentence like that I knew I would be cumming
I have never paid for drugs and I'm sure not going to start today especially on a holiday
Visions of polite missionary are dancing in my head right now kinda and it alarms me
The only thing that makes a night with half a bottle of cheap vodka is the other half of that bottle of cheap vodka.
i black out too much to be "responsible"
she was sitting with her tits completely out.. on the kitchen floor..eating pickles by the handful... rapping mac dre... and then lit up a cig and continued...that drunk
tonight's safe word is brought to you by the phrase "Ahhhhhh"
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