Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
im trying to make cookies in the george foreman
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
It's going to be great. We're a perfect team to break up marriages and happiness.
I just saw the list where the U.S. doesn't even rank in the top 10 in drinking countries. I know its Tuesday but....its for America
No that's sign language, not a drinking game. I tried to join
I think I suffocated him while I was riding his face
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
She offered to treat me to breakfast after a one night stand if I meet her parents and sex again if I act as her bf. It may be a trap but its a offer I won't refuse.
Wanna play whack-a-mole in my pants?
Your word choices worry me.
He's a psychology major, so instead of becoming a stripper, I'm just working out my daddy issues with him. And his cock. And spankings.
They're much more educational now btw. Don't judge.
I mean. I'm excited for the Seahawks too. I just love nachos.
You left me a message at 3am crying because you just found out there's a Paddington Bear statue in Peru.
THEY LEFT ME IN A CLUB BY MYSELF. I’M SO ANNOYED. I’M GOING TO FUCK THEIR BARTENDER FRIEND. Caps only because I’m really mad.
I once went to target high on hydrocodone. I assure you, they can handle unrespectable.
Randomize
