Hey you
You're the only one I'll text back during sex. what's up?
Does it still count as a "walk of shame" if it's only 1am?
RAWRRRR IMA PURPLE DINO
dude i'm sitting right next to you.. stop texting me
i hate that site..its like every vagina you dont wanna see
my brother is a facebook fan of two things: God, and Rhianna. if he's not a prime example of the rare "baptist closeted gay," i don't know who is.
You do realize it's a Tuesday, right?
You do realize I stopped giving a fuck about calendars when I was 10, right? And besides, it could be the best Tuesday of your life.
So... he formspringed me a link to every nude pic ive taken since he 8th grade. ive evolved nicely. but im nervous as to how this a website.
He started telling people I was Stephen Hawking's son. When that didnt fly he switched to Tony Romo's cousin
A piece of cheeseburger just fell between my tits. Consider this a "wish you were here" postcard.
I don't care how drunk you were. Sending me a pic of your dick dressed as Uncle Sam with the caption "I want you" isn't an acceptable pick up line.
Walked into my campus store carrying a pitcher of sangria. No fucks given. Also this recipe is banging.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
He ended up buying the equivalent of dinner at a Mexican place, in weed
I don't know if your celebrity crush has ever asked you for nudes, but it's fucking awesome
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
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