1. Call me if you need ANYTHING. 2. If you get tag teamed, I want details.
i want to have as much fun as i did last weekend. but plus the condom and minus the fear.
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
I'm on his itunes. He has a sex playlist. It's actually not so much a playlist as 12 Kylie Minogue songs with a big gay Whitney finish.
I have to overdose on valtrex I had a rough weekend.
I don't remember much of half-time. I do remember climbing onto the roof of the fraternity and telling people I was going to stargaze in French.
I remember seeing his penis I just dont know exactly what I did with it
There were grown college boys running around north campus in capes with nerf guns. If security were to be called I think they would just give them more beer.
Well get back to your date and give him the ceremonial 1am handy and text me when your done.
I just love that it's Veterans Day because I know in my heart that I have serviced some of their brethren in the dirtiest, hottest, most shameful ways possible.
Opened the browser on my phone to a web search for midget birth rates per capita. A good night.
He dislocated his shoulder trying to finger me last night if that tells you anything
Is it possible to be sexually attracted to someone's hair?
My nerves will need dicks later so.. I'll call you
An "unreasonable amount of ejaculate" isn't a reason to be angry at me.
Randomize
