i miss you so much
i miss you too
oops, did i send that to you? i meant to send it to the money you owe me
Ummmm the art teacher neighbor asked me to pose nude for her art class for cash.
there's just something about her that screams "i'm into chicks who wear flannel"
I fucked him in a hamburger. literally. he has a hamburger bed.
you screamed santa and jumped in front of 50 kids to tell him you wanted a bong for christmas.
all he has to do is look at me on new years and hes getting laid. thats how hot he is
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
Apparently I grabbed her ponytail and cut it with an exacto knife.
No kidding. I just keep looking at that 'under 21 until 11/21/2011' on my id and whispering "soon enough"
It was a perpetual wrestle for who got to be on bottom. Laziest hookup ever.
I'm still drunk. it's summer. I just need a hot dog and an aspirin.
So is there a reason your dad is passed out naked in my shower? P.S. Congrats on the family dong.
I didn't get it..
I'm sorry. But to the original question please.
How the fuck did he think me asking about the possibility of a threesome was a rhetorical question?
really who shits their pants then locks themselves out of their apartment? ... I threw my underwear out in a random bathroom
Clearly the Stanley Cup Finals good luck hand job IS necessary. You let the whole team down.
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