what's the vibe there?
extraordinary amounts of gine
Tonight must have been good, I have already had two cups of coffee but still couldn't figure out how to operate a door.
Don't put random dicks in your mouth or any other crevice for that matter... and i'm home in 30 seconds
Wish I got that text last night instead of this morning.
I literally paid him in shots to clean my entire apartment. he even vacuumed...who said alcoholism is a bad thing??
there are some nice people on this island. free ride free pancakes and they even prayed for us when they dropped us off
I think 2012 will be the year I purposely put myself in awkward situations. Much like 2011 but really trying this time. Like fucking the little sister of a girl I already fucked and dating a chick that lives with her ex. It could be awesome or horrible.
Because of him my new motto is "Keep calm and fuck a guy with a beard". Yes, I am serious.
PUB CRAWL IS THE WEEK I COME BACK FROM NOLA OMG OMG OMG. Has it been a year already since I tried to make out with you and you let a bar tender take a shot out of your cleavage? Time flies.
Come to my pity party. It's being hosted in my basement. The theme is ambiguously sexual cuddling and wine.
It threw me off a little. I had to take a moment and ask myself, "Is he really fingering me in his mom's kitchen while I eat a whopper?"
All i remember from last night was that i was sitting on the toilet for a good hour eating a philly cheesesteak hotpocket... then i woke up... in my bed.
I love that you put so much thought and effort into your nudes
I don't send half assed nudes. Go big or go home.
I spent half my night explaining that i'm in an open relationship to the guys that I liked, and the other half of the night explaining that I have a boyfriend to the guys that I didn't like.
Tell me you're alive little brother. And please tell me you didn't get arrested. You made no fucking sense last night in your random texts and pictures you were sending me.
if I start to respond to these political texts with a middle finger emoji - do you think they will get the hint?
Randomize
