I did my dad and i had to keep going back there to pick up coffee
please read the first 4 words of that text and consider punctuation
Just got invited out of group to take shots after hearing her gay friend say "why would I give him my alcohol so you can suck his dick. It's going to be a good night
I don't want to get into details but it feels like there was a bear mauling involved. A very good bear mauling.
I cant be sure, but i think ive been drunk in this church before.
i was debating whether to load antoher bowl when i realized i was holding a sandwich in one hand and a cookie in the other. and laughing.
I told him to just roll me a blunt and put it in a heart shaped box.
he was like captain planet, but less blue and more nakeed
Just smoked the bong while taking a dump. I love living by myself.
As long as he continues to be our subleaser and continues to fuck me, I think it's acceptable for me to steal a piece of bread here and there.
Also, I just opened Google to find the lyrics to California Gurls. Karaoke night did us dirty.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
So I pass out narcotics if its a girl?
You had blacked out Skype sex? Wow we live in the future
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
If the multiverse is real, would you screw yourself? I'd screw myself.
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