I met a girl last nite that charged by the inch. i didnt have enough money but i figured shed be a good deal for u
i bet even starving children in Africa take the crust off their poptarts
Ever since I discovered that youporn works on blackberry, my brickbreaker skills have gone to shit
the cops didnt even wait to start drinking the confiscated alchohol from the party
I just ditched my friends to hang out with the chilis restaurant crew...one of these girls better have daddy issues
I've never had goosebumps on my dick before. It was definitely not a bad feeling.
Now I can't unsee my hot boss's under-boobs. Monday will be awkward.
Pics or STFU
She made sure everyone knew we were doing shots for her dead grandma.
In my opinion the party was fun, but i did A LOT of cocaine so my view was a little distorted......
Not many people can say they've been photo bombed by an antelope. I sure did.
I think I just did my first walk of shame. He sent me home with a watermelon from his farm. Southern one night stands.
Completely unrelated and mildly related, a guy I hooked up with last year in a threeway died, his obit photo was his Grindr photo
Masturbating with Lord of the Rings on was not how I planned my afternoon going but here I am.
All you have to drink is moonshine and ranch. This is bullshit.
Magyver!
does 2pm fall under the wake n bake category?
Randomize
