Is this a definitive no? All is forlorn? Such is fine, but i'm drunk and a sucker for concrete answers
my dad told me i had to spend my money wisely..so i spent the money he gave me for a desk chair on weed. ill be so high i wont even notice its gone
You don't think I'm weird or immature right?
No I think it's cute we had sex on your Bob the Builder sheets
I havnt had this much beer since i losodt my virginity. thank. god.
They're making scrambled eggs at 2 in the morning... with rum
And then she proceeded to fling her bra around while screaming the rocket power theme song, still managing to not fall off the skateboard
K. On the way. I need a drink.
Like a drink drink or like water?
Have we met?
Good thing it was his birthday because I accidentally grabbed his dick at the bar. A lot.
Did you Fuck minivan and her friend last night?
It's all coming back to me. I drank moonshine from a milk carton from a guy named tomohawk last night.
Yo plow her in the living room were all outside tommy wants to see
Serious question: when you had my right nipple in your mouth, did my nipple ring have both of the balls on it, or was it missing one. Current situation: missing one.
Bumble is fuckin insane here. I'm going to break a hip.
Also my roomate used some of my condoms so she gave me her hummus. Great trade
Dude, I just feel great. I love life so much and I love you. Love. Love. So much love.
Randomize
