I'm gonna play a drinking game called "Sarah takes the train"
i cant cry in cvs. not again.
All he wants to do is masturbate while I sit there with my big toe up his ass that is not even the worst part of it.
so, what part of "he's slept with a guy" do you not understand?
Glad we went casual last night, made my 1pm walk of shame through Walmart a little less obvious
Day drunk and a can of soup and wine straight from the bottle and alone and on my kitchen floor.
Besides the kids on acid... I was the highest kid there
We have a nice shopping list..vibrators and roller blades
Priorities
You were spooning an empty magnum of white wine in the middle of the bed so I slept on the couch
Well at least there's no more confusion about your place in my life. Wine > pizza > your dick > the rest of you.
Love you...
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
I don't question myself. That's what I have you for.
I'm honored.
MY INSIDES ARE BASICALLY BEING WRUNG BY A CHAINSAW IM NEVER TAKING PLAN B AGAIN
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
I got a gay guy to motorboat me. These tits could change the world, I'm telling you.
I don't even remember what dignity looks like anymore. I JUST WANTED TO ROAST SOME POTATOES
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